Wednesday, October 21, 2015

Foster Care

If you don't already know, Alan and I became a licensed foster home in July.  The decision to foster did not come over night.  The first time we thought about it was about 3 years ago.  We went with some friends to an information meeting for foster/adoption at a church in McKinney.  We were interested, but the timing wasn't right.  About a year later we went to another interest meeting with the same couple because they were looking at getting involved with a child who was involved with CPS.  I filled out my part of the application but we never got further than that...the timing still wasn't right.  Then last November we moved and in January we started attending a new church.  The first week we were there I noticed THEY were having a foster/adopt interest meeting for a new ministry the church was starting.  I showed Alan, but said nothing further.  After seeing the info in the bulletin for a few weeks Alan said to me, "I think we should go."  Honestly, I was floored because I didn't think it was a good time. We had just moved and were getting used to owning a house, etc.  But since he was interested I said sure, and we made plans to go.  The week of the meeting we ended up at lunch with some friends and talked straight through the interest meeting and missed it entirely.  My first thought was, "Oh well...must not be the right time..." and then Alan said, "Maybe you can get the info from someone on Wednesday..." and I thought again.  That Wednesday I asked around and got some info...there would be training classes coming up and a CPR class in the near future if we were interested.  Alan told me to sign us up...so I did.  And we became CPR certified and then in March we had 2 Saturday's of all day training.

After that there is a MOUNTAIN of paperwork (and yes -- I mean a mountain!).  A good blogger would have pictures of each thing and then also pics of mailing it off....but I am by no means a good blogger...so you will just have to believe me.  Alan and I set 'early summer' as when we would like to have all our paperwork in.  We got all of our paperwork in by the beginning of June and then waited for it to go through licensing.  While at a sign language workshop the first week of July we got the news that we were officially certified. We knew that we would have to wait until after our trip to Ireland the second week of July to be officially open to taking kids, but we were licensed!

During the time that we worked on paperwork we began to collect the things we might need.  See, foster care is a very different thing all in it's own.  You never know what will be coming through your door.  You give them a 5 year age range for your license and then you tell your placing agency more specifically what you would like -- but you just never know.  You could get a 5 day old, 5 month old, or 5 year old....or all of the above...and need to have SOMETHING for them!  We collected car seats and beds and toys and clothes and bottles and this and that and the other.  We got things off of garage sale sites, at resale stores and from dear friends. The garage began to look like a consignment store of it's own.  And then we waited.

Off we went to Ireland.  It was truly a fantastic trip and we enjoyed every minute of it, knowing that upon return our lives could change very quickly.  And then we came back and anxiously awaited 'the call'.  That week I worked at the children's theater's summer workshops.  The first afternoon we got a call, but Alan and I agreed that with our schedules that week it wasn't a good match, so we had to say no.  It was hard -- but God showed up in the situation!  That evening we got call number 2.  But another family was picked.  So we waited.  Tuesday afternoon I was at a student's home when we got call #3.  I immediately said YES! and quickly learned that after the YES is another waiting game.  I now liken it to childbirth...labor starts but it's a bit of a waiting game to see how it will progress.  After several hours I got a call that said they didn't think the child would be placed with us.  Then I got a call that all they needed was our approval through the agency and the placement would be finalized. (These two calls happened about 45 minutes apart.)  So I call the agency and say please call and approve this and then go back to waiting.  I was a bit stressed that afternoon! Finally, the call came saying the child had been placed with us and was on the way.  An hour later, we were parents...and our lives changed forever!  Visits, visits, and more visits....little sleep...lots of paperwork...some more visits....daycare...work...more paperwork...
....and more love than you could ever imagine!  You guys -- I fall in love with my husband over and over again as I watch him with this child.  I have never seen him so smitten - and I love it.  As with any foster care case we really don't know how it will end.  The goal of foster care is always reunification...and I've got a whole blog post cooking on that...so we just have no idea.  We just know the child is here for now and so for now our lives center on the child.  

Some 'just-so-you-know's:
-I cannot post any information about the child on the blog...not their name, their age, etc...please don't ask
-I cannot post pics.  Unfortunately this means my blog could become very devoid of pics...except the occasional pic of a puppy....
-I cannot post about the specifics of the child's case
-I can post about what I'm learning through this experience...and expect me to...and I can answer any questions you may have about foster care.
-upcoming posts:
--Why Foster Care
--What Foster Care Has Taught Me
--Attachement
--Foster Care and Spiritual Parallels


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